And by that I mean I rarely finish through with said challenges. I always start out with guns ablazin' and with a ton of motivation, but within a couple of weeks it slowly burns out and I am right back where I started. That being said... I have 118 days until I am going to be in Jamaica. I am crazy excited, and yet dreading it at the same time. I'll never be "skinny" for say, I am a thicker individual period, my mom use to say I am "big boned" but really I just naturally have meat on my bones. But over the years, especially after meeting my amazing husband, my physical activity dwindled a little, then comes the ankle debacle of 2009 where I was in a boot for 9 months and had surgery on my ankle to stretch the inside tendon around the back of my heel to the outside to replace the one I blew out. When I was 19 I weighed in at 125 pounds and I thought I was SO fat, especially next to my skinny mini sisters who both weigh in just over 100 pounds... but I am also several inches taller, but you don't see that when your young and I just saw myself as repulsive. Now that I am a little more older and wiser I could kick myself for several reasons 1) 125 seriously? Yes it was unhealthy, but not because I was fat but because that is ridiculously underweight for someone over 5'11. 2) 125 really? That's "fat" I could only be so lucky to be that fat again (well slightly heavier actually considering point #1).
So where am I getting at you ask? I have 118 days (actually less because I have to leave room in there to get my dress altered) so lets say 90 days to lose... wait for it... wait for it... 32 pounds to put me at 145 by June. So yes, basically I am fully admitting that I weigh in right now at 177 pounds - which is considered "healthy" for my height - but I don't want to be at the tipping point of being unhealthy..
So in the next several weeks I am committed to "clean eating" which basically is not eating processed food, as well continuing my cardio, plus I am adding strength training this evening actually and my husband is going to take me to the gym tonight to work on arms. I can't stand going to the gym for anything other then cardio, I have a huge fear of humiliation to a absurd degree so it has kept me from trying to learn how to use the strength training equipment, so as I work on this stupid fear my husband has agreed to work with me at the gym when it is significantly less crowded to help me get over the idea of working out in front of others.
So I am going to keep track of my progress here, a public accountability if you will. Another friend of mine gave me inspiration - she is doing it as well. I am going to take some "before" pictures here soon and I'll post them and I promise not to photoshop!
Here we go!
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